imsoshive:

me: what’s for dinner?

her: *spreads her legs*

me: 

image

so, did you not cook or ….. cause popeyes closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it. 

(via rosaparking)

laikas-owner:

poodlepants:

I was all set to be snarky about this, but I think Neil did well enough on his own.

*Infomercial voice* with such wondrous hits such as “Baby, you’re starlight”, “You make my heart go supernova (duet with Bill Nye)”, and that super great single, “Stars in your eyes”.

laikas-owner:

poodlepants:

I was all set to be snarky about this, but I think Neil did well enough on his own.

*Infomercial voice* with such wondrous hits such as “Baby, you’re starlight”, “You make my heart go supernova (duet with Bill Nye)”, and that super great single, “Stars in your eyes”.

(via neurocybernetics)

the-greasy-goatsby:

After 17 season’s of Pretty Little Liars, A is revealed and captured. The girls hug each other in a safe embrace, but are interrupted by the faint noise of a text. They read it aloud and stare into the distance, “It’s my turn, bitches -B”.

(via alexkralie)

mishasminions:

thebanegrimm:

building-an-unstoppable-fist:

noctom-poetom:

kitd-fohs:

salmonslushie:

i saw this on one of those strange little picture slideshow websites so i decided to post it ;) have fun kids

I have found heaven and it’s full of liquor

This is how adults play games lol

im really feelin that sexual jenga and the fucking alcohol chess.

I have my version of the jenga game it’s awesomes

I CAN’T EVEN PLAY JENGA WHEN I’M SOBER

(via spicy-vagina-tacos)

pansexual-pelican:

elisabomb:

I ALWAYS LAUGH SO FUCKING HARD WHEN I GET TO THIS PART BECAUSE LOOK AT HOW HUGE DAVE’S FUCKING EYEBROWS ARE, NOBODY ELSE EVEN HAS EYEBROWS ON THEIR SPRITE BUT DAVE HAS THESE GIANT DARK EYEBROWS LURKING UNDER HIS SHADES ALL THE TIME APPARENTLY

his eyebrow game is strong 

pansexual-pelican:

elisabomb:

I ALWAYS LAUGH SO FUCKING HARD WHEN I GET TO THIS PART BECAUSE LOOK AT HOW HUGE DAVE’S FUCKING EYEBROWS ARE, NOBODY ELSE EVEN HAS EYEBROWS ON THEIR SPRITE BUT DAVE HAS THESE GIANT DARK EYEBROWS LURKING UNDER HIS SHADES ALL THE TIME APPARENTLY

his eyebrow game is strong 

(via caledbuttscratch)

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